Thursday, September 08, 2005

tired

I am so tired.

so very, very tired.

I just want to eat a huge meal, and curl up and go to sleep.

but I don't want the indigestion that has been coming every time I eat lately.

My children are wonderful for the most part. I have some beautiful, wonderful, sweet students. I also have some test-ers, and they are testing me. Ho boy, are they ever testing me.

I worry a lot.

My fingertips are sore from guitar.

My back is sore from stupid teacher-shoes that look great but are totally un-ergonomic.

My body and mind are so tired. But when I get to bed, I can't shut it off. I'm stuck there, awake, singing the songs I'm going to sing tomorrow over and over and over and over again, and then scripting what I'm going to do, and worrying about having enough chairs in high school chorus, and worrying if I'm going to destroy my voice again in chorus, and worrying how much they're going to test me.

Tomorrow is very busy. I'm going to teach, and then go to my parents' and nap, and then it's Friday at Friday's again.

I need it.

But Saturday I'm going to sit and do nothing. I'm going to sleep with a vengeance, and I'm going to probably cry, too.

Right now there's something stuck in my throat. It won't go away. It's not physical, but I can feel it there, and no matter how much I cry, it doesn't melt.

The crying is from fatigue. I lost signal on my cell phone yesterday and cried over that. My earpiece doesn't work and I cried about that. I'm a crier lately.

And this post is about as flowing as my thoughts right now. They keep jumping.

2 Comments:

Blogger Jess said...

*hugs*

I have some intuitive feelings about your crying as well as the indigestion thing; I wonder if they make sense to you. I won't share them here for everyone to see, but at some point I'd like to share them with you.

Let's talk soon . . . tomorrow night or over the weekend, ok hun? You can just call and cry if you want, no talking necessary. ;)

Until then, take good care of yourself, alright? Do something fun, something that makes you smile . . . and I'll talk to you very soon. Love you!

September 08, 2005 10:01 PM  
Anonymous Michel said...

En fait tu as la gorge nouée par le stress , Emily . Je crois que c ' est le cas de beaucoup de professeurs . Cela va aller mieux .
Tous mes encouragements
Michel

September 11, 2005 4:13 PM  

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